Todd had trouble every time he crossed the border into the land of two dimensionals. It bothered him to not be able to see around people, see their other side, or see them from the side. Sure they were people just like he was, but who can trust a person like that? And he wasn’t so sure anyone there could even tell that he wasn’t of their kind. It was a depressing experience to be sure, and he would avoid it altogether if he could. Unfortunately he could not, for the border lay unceremoniously right across his front stoop. Three stairs descended from his home, his sanctuary, and then leveled out in bi-axil reality as far as the eye could see. In his finished basement, a comfortable space situated reassuringly below his kitchen, entrance way and living room, he was constructing a model of the known universe. It was an ambitious endeavor of chipboard, leftover produce, clay and crayon, and Todd knew in his three dimensionally beating heart that it was painfully inaccurate. His mind was not the sharpest, it lacked that ruthless edge he witnessed of certain two dimensionals, and he had no real working hypothesis on how to reconcile the two universes. The phrase “two universes” itself was an inherent contradiction, but he couldn’t think of any better way to describe it. Despite years of effort the model remained an unintelligible mess.
It was an ambitious endeavor of chipboard, leftover produce, clay and crayon, and Todd knew in his three dimensionally beating heart that it was painfully inaccurate.
And so one day, after a particularly frustrating day trying to relate to the two dimensionals but being wholly unable to get them to understand any of his deepest desires and fears, and deducing that none of them had any deep desires or fears at all, he marched down to his basement and toppled the whole thing over. The chipboard and clay and paint and produce was violently sent over and into and onto itself before coming to rest on the floor. To a neutral observer it didn’t look all that different or less accurate in this new state, but to Todd the job was heartbreakingly unfinished. He bent his knees, eyed the ceiling, swelled his chest and belly with a deep deep breath, and leapt as high as he could with all his might above the tumbled model. His smile was almost perfectly crooked as he felt it flatten beneath his feet.